The Last Entry
by AimeeDanielle97
Summary: Hey everyone. Before you read, NONE OF THIS IS INTENDED TO BE CORRECT. This is a story based on MY OWN take on it anyway. it is a one shot and it is entirely fictional. its my idea of what the last entry in rivers diary could be. Will have explanation of MY theory in 2nd chapter. just know that this is not the ACTUAL story of River Song haha. enjoy it sweeties! ;)
1. Chapter 1

My breath caught in my throat as I saw him. The slanky way in which he walked, the casual way his hand went up in an instant and he brushed his fingers through his brown, soft hair. There was nothing for it, he had me hooked, in the very first instant in which I saw him. The very first time I laid eyes on him. The man I was going to kill. All right, I'll admit, the first time, I was more taken by his apparent youth. I'd imagined he'd be older, wiser. Just less juvenile, it was this, more than anything, that had intrigued me. After all, I was just a child at the time. Now, he's the first thought I have in the morning, and the last before I close my eyes. I'm much more than just intrigued now. And the stories Amelia had told me growing up. But none of them did him justice.

When I met him properly, the day I shot his T.A.R.D.I.S. I couldn't quite believe just how _intrigued_ I'd become. The day was a rather interesting one, I may have sent him a few, _mixed signals _(if you know what I mean). Well, it wasn't anything drastic I suppose. Yes, I did poison him, and he died. But, naturally, I brought him back. Alls well that ends well, I suppose. But you see, it was his secret. I certainly had to bring him back after that. Of course, I would tell you what that secret was, but, well, spoilers. It ended up quite the interesting day. But I was glad I brought him back. I had feelings for him now, real feelings. I had to find him, get to know him. It was so important.

And I did. He took me to see the stars. Not the stars you'd think. Oh no. The Doctor doesn't do anything by halves. He took me to see the sky that had so many stars it was as if it were daylight. He'd seemed perfectly fine that night. Until the _other_ doctor showed up with the _other_ me. The future versions of us. I had a future. Better yet, a future with him. But he'd never seemed happy to see them. If only I'd known why at the time, but I guess I'm awfully glad I didn't. I'm not sure I could have coped.

I myself was perfectly relaxed that night. I had the doctor, right where I wanted him. It was perfect. But he did leave. The same way he always does. He flew away in that big blue box of his. He waved goodbye with the promise of tomorrow. But he still left. And it was damned near impossible to find him again. That's when I went to the university. Oh how hard I worked, so that I'd have the ability to find him if ever and whenever I want. Too bad I never knew how wrong it would go.

And the day came as sure as ever. Back in that same white suit that had haunted me as a child. It was in control. For the first time in a long time, I had no way out. No way out at all. I shot him, again and again, and then again, right in the middle of his regeneration sequence. While the future me just stood there and watched. That's what confused me the most. How could I stand and watch? I knew what was happening. I must of. But then the Doctor, he said he'd brought the future me to prove that I was forgiven "...for a murder you probably can't even remember. My murder." It had made no sense at the time. No sense at all. And he was dead. It was over.

I killed him, and then we still continued to have adventures. Story of my life, life with the Doctor is anything but simple. And I fell in love. Of course I fell in love. And we ran together. He knew his death was coming, he knew it was a fixed point, he didn't know it was I that were to shoot him. He was running from his death and I was running from killing him. But I'd already killed him. And I hadn't. Right in the same moment, two different versions of reality. Talk about confusion, but, that's life with the Doctor I suppose.

I re-wrote a fixed point, I froze time, and all of history began happening at once. The Doctor wasn't exactly impressed. So I married him that day. See, confusing. I married him, and then proceeded to allow him to allow me to kill him. But it wasn't the Doctor at all. That man, oh that amazing man. He's always cleverer than the rest of us. And there is always a way out. Even a way out of a fixed point, oh that amazing man. He knew what was coming, and he borrowed the tesselector. I didn't kill him after all. This time, it was Kovarian who wasn't best pleased. She came for me, she came with the silence, and they took me away.

I was studying in the library when they came. "tick tock." they'd said. It was awful. They took me and they did something that messed with everything. Wherever it was they'd taken me, I knew I had been there in another life. Part of me had always known it was coming, but the other parts had helped me forget. But it came. Sorted. I was sorted. They had me on another timeline now. I knew that much. His future was my past. That was why he'd given me the diary. And now I had to go back through my timeline. They'd reversed it on me. My original past, the timeline I had been on, was now my future. Hence, the Doctor's past is my future, and my future is his past. I only had some memories of the timeline I'd been on. But not enough to know I'd killed him.

I found myself in the highest security prison there is. Stormcage. And for the life of me, I couldn't remember why. I knew I'd killed someone. But, at this point, I didn't know who. But, even the highest security prison wasn't enough to hold me. The Doctor came in his T.A.R.D.I.S. and took me to see the sky that had so many stars it were as if it were daylight. Are you getting it now? He'd given me the diary, I now knew that I was River Song. His River Song. My Doctor, he came often and we had adventures. Oh how we ran. He was running from his death, and so was I, not that I knew it at this point.

We had so many adventures together. And then the day came. I returned to my cell to find a little blue envelope on my bed. Specifically, T.A.R.D.I.S. blue. Time, date and a map reference. It was an invitation. So I sorted myself out and got myself there as fast as my vortex manipulator could carry me. We laughed and ate a picnic. Until it happened, the astronaut. An Apollo Astronaut. It rose out of the lake. I'd never seen anything quite like it. Rory, Amy and I were all incredibly shocked to see it. But not the Doctor. Of course he wasn't surprised. He got up, warned us all not to interfere and sauntered off towards it. Oh and, lets not forget that a fourth man showed up first. He had also been invited. Either way, the Doctor sallied on down to the Astronaut and allowed it to shoot at him. Then, time ripped itself apart. Or Rather, all of history began happening at once. And then I remembered.

The memories rushed back into my mind so, so quickly. Kovarian and her plan, what they'd done to me as a child, every aspect of my history, but most importantly, the other timeline. I remembered who my parents were, that I'd Killed the Doctor, that I'd been forced to kill him. I'd been the one in that space suit. Now, he and I were the opposite polls of this... explosion of time. I could never touch my Doctor again if I wanted to see him alive, and it just about broke me.

When he finally came to the pyramid in Ciaro, my inner self was so delighted to see him. I just wanted to throw myself at him. But one, that was so not my style, and two, I couldn't touch him. But oh how he tried. That amazing man, always so ready to lay down his own life to save others. But I was not prepared to let him die. So I'd been working on a plan, asking for help. But he didn't exactly react well when I showed it to him. But, no surprises, thats when things get confusing. Very, very confusing. He married me. He yelled at me, and then married me. Oh and we kissed. What a beautiful, amazing bittersweet kiss. And I shot him by the lakeside. But it was never really him. He'd been inside the tesselector the whoe time and was, in his own words, "...barely singed."

And so the Doctor lived on, and I also. And our adventures continued. We solved the mysery of the Pandorica and I helped him re-boot the universe, he caught me as I jumped from the Byzantium and then helped us as we fought the weeping angels, he took me out night after night for, more private adventures. Wow, wha a _spoiler._

And all the while, I was petrified. Travelling in different time streams. Each time I saw him, I knew him so much more, but he, he knew me that much less. It was killing me. Coming for me was a day where I would stare into his perfect eyes, the eyes of my Doctor, my husband, and he wouldn't have the faintest idea who I was. I knew that day would break me. I absolutely lived for each moment I got to spend with him, but each precious moment I had, put me that one moment closer to losing him forever.

Then came the night he took me to see the Singing Towers of Derilium. He'd been promising for years. I had the most amazing time. But the Doctor cried. The tears fell from his wonderful eyes. I never knew why. I couldn't know why. But of course, the Doctor knew. His past was my future. He gave me his Sonic Screwdriver that night. That should have been an indication. And then we parted ways. He never said goodbye.

Then that was it, I went to the library. There he was, that perfect man! Just a different face. And it happened. I begged him to know who I was, willed it with all my might, but all I got from those perfect eyes was a blank, confused stare. I needed him to trust me though, so that we could at least get out of the library. So I whispered his name in his ear. That certainly did it. Of course he was still confused, and he had absolutely no idea who I was, but at least he trusted me.

And for the second time in my lifetime, I saw no way out. But I knocked him out, he's unconscious right now. I have him handcuffed to the railing, too far away from his screwdriver, myself and what I am doing, so that he can't stop me. He's going to want to stop me. He's going to beg and try to reason. But we have no choice. He can't stop this, this time there's nothing he can do. This is where I die. So, Doctor, this will be my last adventure. My last entry in this book of stories. Our stories.

And you and I know, somewhat all too well, that we are just mere stories in the end. So Doctor, did I make it a good one?


	2. Chapter 2

**Story Explanation**

Okay so I have always wondered about something: If River and the Doctor were travelling in different time streams, how could Mels have grown up with Amy and Rory, because we know Amy and Rory are definitely on the same time stream as the doctor. Also, we know from Kovarian keeping child River in the orphanage and from the kid being constantly "eaten" by the space suit, that River was trained to kill the doctor when she was a child. This is clearly confirmed when the first thing she does after regenerating (when melody changes actress to Alex Kingston) is poison the doctor. Way before kovarian and the silence come back for her in the library when she's studying archeology. Also, haven't you ever wondered why river is so shocked to see Kovarian in that library. Why she's petrified and shouting "who are you?" At her?

Well. I've sat for ages and attempted to figure it out. So here goes nothing. This is my theory:

River wasn't always on a different time stream as the doctor. Yeah she was taken away by Kovarian at birth, but she was raised on the same time stream, hence mels was able to grow up with Amy and Rory. So, melody (Alex Kingston's melody) tried to kill him the first day she met him. This was before she loved him and before any of their adventures. Hence she doesn't know who "River" is. But, as we know, whatever the doctor whispered in her ear caused her to use up all of her remaining regenerations to bring him back. So, she's done what Kovarian asked, then completely reversed it, found out that she's river and that the doctor loves her all in one very weird day. Also, note that, The Doctor has memories of this River as well, another major indicator that they're not on different time streams yet. At the end of this episode, he gives her the diary.

So then the next appearance (if we actually go in order) was the night he picked her up to take her to see the sky that had so many stars at night that it looked like day light. He explains that the book is for their adventures, that they're travelling in different time streams so she's to record her adventures so that they can coordinate themselves. At which point river states that shes in the highest security prison of all, what adventures could she possibly have. So, this is her first night in stormcage, with this information, we can conclude that she's already killed the doctor (technically, she's done it twice). Major indicator that something very weird happened to her timeline following "lets kill Hitler". Right, time to use your brains, because this is where it gets complicated.

We all know that the moment Kovarian and the Silence return to Kidnap River is after the episode "lets kill Hitler." We also know that River is extremely shocked to see Kovarian at this point. Also, we know she's in stormcage for murdering the doctor (thanks to a very handy minisode). So, we know that by the time Kovarian returns to get River, she's already killed the Doctor (like twice). So, clearly Kovarian has something else she wants to do.

So the theory behind the strange return of Kovarian to kidnap River this second time is that she was only taken so that Kovarian could reverse her timeline. Which I guess you can understand. Kovarian wanted the doctor dead, but River had killed him twice, and Twice he'd managed to miraculously return from the dead. But this is super confusing, because, river who's in the library at uni, only recalls killing him once. She doesn't know she's killed him again in Utah.

So the night Kovarian goes to the uni to kidnap river and reverse her timeline happens between "lets kill hitler" and the "night and the doctor" minisodes. Kovarian reverses rivers time line. So she's effectively about turned and sent back from where she came. Hence there are two Rivers on the beach in utah. Thats not a past river and a future river. Doctor who isn't that simple. Thats the past river, from the original timeline, who'd travelling in the same way as the doctor (this is the river that shoots him) and the one watching is the future river, travelling backwards, opposite to the doctor, who can't remember killing the doctor because her memories of her previous time line are few and far between. Which is obvious: 1. The doctor says he invited the future-new-time line her so that she'd know she's was forgiven and that that version of herself was serving time for a murder she probably can't even remember, his murder. 2. She says "how can I be there" clearly confused as to why a future version of herself would be standing there, knowing whats about to happen and not stopping it, she doesn't know that the other her is now travelling backwards and doesn't remember killing the doctor at all.

But of course we know, the event in utah happens twice. Two different verions of reality, happening in the same instant. The one where River drains her weapons system without killing him, that rips time apart, causes her to remember everything about the other timeline. This is proven in the pyramid when the river that is on the new time line won't let the doctor touch her because she knows that, as they are opposite polls of the (explosion?) that him touching her will take them back to the lake side and she'll be killing him. So, the river that shoots him in the version where he does die is the river on the timeline the same as the doctor. And the river that shoots him in the version where they end up in ciaro is the new river, after she's had her timeline reversed and is travelling back along her own timeline, clearly now in a different dorection to the doctor. I really hope that made sense.

It is after this point where they have the rest of their adventures, including the pandorica's box/the big bang and the crash of the byzantium etc etc. It is why that river in the episodes leading up to "lets kill Hitler" know's exactly who the docotor is to her, but the river in lets kill hitler up to when kovarian kidnaps her to mess up her timeline, actually doesn't know who who he is to her.

I really hope that made sense... It made sense in my head haha. So that is just my theory on the story of River Song/Melody Pond. Yay. Hope its at least close to being right...


End file.
